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Connecting in the Quiet

10/27/2020

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It was our first publishing event and when the whirlwind of set up finally settled, I began to look about the room and notice what happens within the nooks and crannies of an experience like this one. What I noticed I think was something necessary. In the quiet of the classroom, where students wore masks and kept themselves at a distance, there were humans connecting with other humans. They connected in the room with reading and writing, in ways that maybe only quiet can bring into light. These young writers connected with one another with small pieces of colored paper―notes left for the authors. 

I don’t really know if there could be anything much more powerful than moments like these in a classroom. 

“I’m sorry about your sister…”
“I loved your story… it made me laugh…”
“I hope you didn’t have anything else that is bad.”
“Your story made me sad. But I loved it…”



If there were a way to see what healing looks like, I’m sure it was then that it happened. 


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Some Photo memories of 2020

10/20/2020

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There was a time when we could huddle 
and come close to laugh and smile. 

It is important that we notice the times 
that overflowed with love.
   

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There were unexpected needs to fill 
and so we tried to fill them. 
Cotton bags with books 
plastic bags to fill the bellies.
 

It is important that we notice
there are those with greater need.

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Baby chicks that fill the heart 
a son’s recipe for the world’s best cookies. 

It is important that we stop and notice 
when there is sweetness in the air.

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There were birthdays that were celebrated 
flowers that grew love.  

It is important that we notice 
when things are done with love.

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Look up into the sky for peace.
It’s so easy to forget. 

It is important that we notice places 
where light and earth connect.

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There were lessons to be learned. 
Familiar faces in strange new places. 

It is important that we notice places 
where there’s great need to reconnect.

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The dried flowers and their seeds 
promised hope would grow again.
 

It is important to remember
that not all our hopes come true.

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Remember to look up again 
to experience the good. 

It is important to take time to notice 
the place where light and night caress 
before they say goodbye.

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There are poems that exist 
that help us say goodbye. 

It is important that we notice when 
it’s time for us
to say goodbye.


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There were times to start anew. 
Bruised and tired on occasion. 

It is important that we notice when 
it’s time to stop 
and find a day to start again.

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And there are little things around us. 
They remind us to find joy.  

It is important that we notice every little thing 
the goodness that surrounds us.

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Through inevitable accidents 
that force a time for rest. 

It is important that we notice things 
will carry on without us. 

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In times of healing rest, 
there are memories of years ago
of tiny feet, 
in tiny summer shoes.

It is important that we notice those we love. 
It is important that they know.

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There were battles fought 
with quiet strength.
Battles not yet finished. 

It is important that we stand for things.
So, stand for things that are important. 

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Those tiny feet, 
in tiny shoes,
not tiny anymore,
continue learning how to stand for something.
 
It is important that we notice 
what we do 
who we are 
and what we stand for

We plant seeds that do take root.

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Twenty-Five Years

10/13/2020

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On October 28th, my husband and I will celebrate 25 years of marriage. That. Is. A. Long. Time. 
There is a lot to celebrate, our two sons are our greatest reason to celebrate. We will also  celebrate having come this far, this long, and still sleep in the same bed. I’m not sure if anyone knows, but marriage is not an easy thing to do.

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We Learned to Smile

10/6/2020

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Last week, I received a comment on one of my posts, from Maureen Ingram. She wrote, “I loved this phrase, “we learned to smile with our eyes” – and think it would be a beautiful opening line to a poem about these times, yes?” Teaching in the classroom this year proved to truly be a place for change and learning for all who entered.


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My Joy List

7/14/2020

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While I have been working my best to distance myself from the news that surrounds every place communication resides, I decided to focus my attention on joy. It is important to find joy, but sometimes I forget to look for it. Sometimes I need to remember on purpose, so today I chose to write a simple list of things that bring me joy. They were listed as they came, in no particular order. 

  1. The smell of Jergens lotion. It reminds me of childhood. 
  2. The sound of waves crashing down onto the sand and starting over again.  
  3. Smelling the salty ocean in the air before it appears.
  4. Suntan lotion. It reminds me of home.
  5. The whistling sound of a cool breeze blowing through the leaves of many trees.
  6. The color green.
  7. The color blue.
  8. My mother’s arms.
  9. Laying my ear against my son’s chest to hear his heart beating. 
  10. Kicking my feet up on my bed and listening to my son tell a story. 
  11. My hands in the dirt.
  12. Watching chickens chase each other for fun.
  13. Hide and Go Seek… with anyone. 
  14. Acting out a read aloud.
  15. Jumping and waving at the sight of a student far down the hall, because waiting for a new day is long.
  16. Morning sunlight through my bedroom window.
  17. The unexpected laughter that erupts after hearing someone’s contagious laugh.
  18. Laughing out loud until it hurts.
  19. Listening to Yo-Yo Ma.
  20. Witnessing acts of courage.
  21. The sounds of a group listening, laughing, and reacting to a story.
  22. Koi fish.
  23. Reading in absolute silence.
  24. Writing in absolute silence.
  25. Listening to friends share stories.
  26. Breathing out into a smile.
  27. Walking among pine trees. 
  28. Water lilies. 
  29. Peachy-Pink Gerbera Daisies. 
  30. Pomegranate green tea.
  31. Dutch chocolate ice cream with sliced almonds.
  32. The shadow of a leafy tree on green grass.
  33. Water gun wars.
  34. Playing Chess with my dad.
  35. Sculpting grey clay into life.
  36. Watching the seeds I planted, grow.
  37. Pausing to watch a load during the wash cycle. 
  38. Fresh sheets.
  39. Organic coffee.
  40. Lyrical poetry. 
  41. My uncle calling me, Marinita.
  42. My sister Sandra’s garden.
  43. My sister Lisa’s giving heart. 
  44. Having my mother’s tamales.
  45. Listening to my father’s family stories. 
  46. Listening to my aunt Flora’s gentle voice.
  47. Conferencing with a writer. 
  48. Going out to a good movie. 
  49. James Arthur songs.
  50. Green tree frogs.
  51. Large butterflies swimming through my backyard.
  52. Causing change with written words.
  53. Receiving a box in the mail, any size.
  54. Smudge free eyeglasses.
  55. Folded laundry.
  56. The sound of my parents laughing together.
  57. Inspiring kids to love reading.
  58. Inspiring kids to love writing. 
  59. Teaching my sons to cook.
  60. Watching my sons become friends. 
  61. Staring into my husband’s eyes and feeling butterflies, every time.
  62. Going for a bike ride.
  63. Falling asleep.
  64. Saturday mornings. 
  65. Hope.
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Ordinary Heroes

7/7/2020

3 Comments

 
Each year that passes, I think of them. That class. The one that left a permanent mark. It was a year that changed me. It may have been a year that changed all of us. When I think back on that class, I’m reminded of all that was good and all that was imperfect. We took all that we knew and all that we didn’t know and became explorers, daring into the unknown to learn more.

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The Best Game of Tag

6/29/2020

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When I was a kid, my parents worked hard to keep me away from sad experiences. They especially worked to keep me from experiences connected to death. That all changed at about the age of seven. It was the summer of the best game of tag.


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Unexpected Hitchhiker

6/23/2020

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I must have been 19 when I took this trip with my dad. We were on our way to Los Angeles. To prep for the one hour trip, I remembered to grab a small cotton hand towel to dry my hands. I don’t like the feel of moist hands, especially when I drive. About 25-30 minutes into the drive, my hands began to feel a little moist. With one hand on the steering wheel, I reached down for the towel with my left hand. Just a quick rub on the cotton towel. No big deal. We were moving close to 70 mph, but I didn’t need to shift my eyes from the road to reach for the towel.

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The Cut On My Left Palm

6/16/2020

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Looking down at my hand this afternoon, I noticed that the large cut on my left palm has healed. It took a few days, but I’m relieved to know that it is much better. In the time it took for me to look it over, memories of the car accident my son had a few years ago began to fill my mind. It took months for him to recover. It was a trauma for him, for all of us. The process of changing bandages, keeping him comfortable and calm is all I focused on those few months. That was not as important as having had him survive it all. He was alive and had both of his legs. All he needed was to heal and learn to walk again. It is as far as my mind will allow me to return to that experience, so my memories push further back to a class I took in high school.

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One Healing Conversation

6/9/2020

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She came in to schedule my next appointment, but in our few minutes we gained much more than I expected.
 
“Hello” she said from behind the mask, as she sat down and began the search for dates on the screen. “I’m going to schedule your next appointment… are you okay with scheduling it for next year?” “Yes, of course,” I said.
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    I write. I read. I learn... and then I write some more.

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